QUARANTINE Life - Bring the MarshMallows

Because the world is on FIRE ... 

We have protests, shuttered buildings, unemployment, fear of unemployment, illness, closed offices, remote work environments, remote learning - our kids are out of school, sports canceled, crunched up necks, terrible hair, muffin tops, feelings of isolation, and anxiety levels at an all time high for many many people.

For me, I see such hope and am in awe of all the great things going on as well ... so much to be thankful for and so many things to focus on that are incredibly positive and inspiring.  I just think we have to acknowledge the difficulties while seeking out the good and the positive surrounding us. 

I see each and every day so many truly amazing acts of kindness towards one another, people are reaching out in ways that seemed to have fallen by the wayside, people are spending time (re)connecting in meaningful ways, people are truly evaluating what is important; friends, families, quality time spent with one another uninterrupted by daily demands, etc. 

There has been a sort of forced movement towards a living a simpler life, a life closer to home and really for us Americans we literally can't go anywhere as countries won't even let us near their borders at this point. 

I was sitting her thinking about how this year, I can't spend the summer in Switzerland thanks to COVID. Every single year before this I just couldn't spend the summer in Switzerland because I couldn't afford it  - it's actually a nice change for me.  I'M not the reason - YOU'RE the reason.  

Honestly, spending time at home these last several months has been a truly positive experience. I may be in the minority but in my "normal" day to day life I feel like I'm always "on" there's no pause, there's no reprieve from it.  It's exhausting on a profound level.
 
I have absolutely loved being at home.  I love my home, I love my porch, my garden, my dogs, my ability to be insanely productive and focused, maintain the cleanest and most organized house on the planet (even with a teen), all my house projects completed, and I have a new renewed focus on myself.  Wait?  Who has time to focus on themselves?  ME!

These many months have given me a much needed break from the world beyond my doorstep. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love the world beyond my doorstep, but as someone with a demanding job, long commute, being a provider, maintaining a home, getting my son to sports 6 days a week, running errands, dealing with issues and normal day to day stressors, it's a lot.
It sort of builds up in your system.  The demands on my time are great.  I know that's our new normal and most people are in the exact same situation but I don't think I realized how overextended I was until I wasn't.

I just think when all you have is deafening static around you, you just don't realize how loud it is until it's silent.

Years ago, Psychology Today published an article called "The Psychology of Silence" - I remember reading it and it changed my behavior to a certain extent.  I pulled into practice some of the concepts relating to the power of silence.

And then I few months later, I completely ignored everything about it and became completely overloaded as usual.

This step-back has really reintroduced the power associated with Silence.

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<<deep sigh>>
How Heavenly

I have been able to focus on the things I love, I have been loving my job, I have been able to step back and control my environment in such a way where I feel rebaselined, whole, happy, and healthy.

It has also provided a space for me to really step back, step back in that silence and sort out what it is that I want.  

So often we do what is expected and at some point in our evolution we have to determine if we we wanted 15, 10, 5, even 1 year ago is what we want NOW.

I think for many of us, it's not or it's not in its current form.

As we change, our interests change, our current skill sets are well honed and refined. Things should become a bit easier leaving room for the new.

I have been spending time thinking about what would I would like to learn, how would I like to grow as the next phase of my life presents itself.

I have realized that while in a very left-brain career, I also need to spend more time feeding my wildly creative side. 

This is what brings contentment in its purest form to my life.  Movement - Dancing, Yoga & Pilates, art projects, writing (especially writing) and to be in a place where I can do it in a very freeing way, unapologetically.

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